I found beauty in you [broken] but you didn't.

how many [deaths] until I'm alive?

how many graves do I perish within before I finally come to rest peacefully in the arms of someone who doesn't need more than who I am?

all you'd never wanted for me is to disintegrate; break into rocks and grime under your lies.

rain comes crashing upon me; the tears of a demi god aching with the thunder because the mortal she loved didn't hold her hand for long;

her wrath is [concentrated rays diverging] born from her pain

her silk and gold only ever shone as if she were a shrine built at her lover's feet and so the bricks dissembled soon

after she's gone when the sun rises from his eternal sleep, I wish he blazes to burn my heart / hope / begin agains

instead of this skin.

instead of my wrath, instead of my doubts.

yes I'm hurting and sometimes, no amount of brighter sides are enough to take it away

I wait for it to dwindle with the smoke but if it leaves and when it leaves, it leaves behind ashes.

-- the ashes; they never let go of my psyche; they look like ghosts and then scars

sometimes they show up as voices

other times as people

most times in the mirror.

I chose something broken, mould and watered it, gold leaves that cast my arms bronze because I peeled them for you

so you could slash my shoulders and bleed me dry because why, my kind heart could never know better

( my mangled carcass of a heart could never do better )

betrayed,

betrayed.

then throw that battered cloak of a soul in me to the godown.

deadbeat I'd fight and climb the steps again, so save me all those false hope and bluffs about true love.

I truly believed you'd love me, flaws and all.

I truly belie—

everything I knew was some work of my foolish mind because why would you ever love something that is so utterly:

broken.

why did you not tell me you'd never?

images aren't mine. ctto!!

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